Sunday Six!

Sunday Six is brought to us by Kelly, and this weeks theme is Memorial Day and Memory. Let her know (and us!) if you played. Here are this week's answers by Matthew (age 5.4):
1. Why do we celebrate Memorial Day?
~~Because we have to-is that correct?

2. How do we celebrate Memorial Day?
~~Because you have to all the time-that's how you do it?

3. What is a memory?
~~You mind

4. What is your best memory?
~~Playing cowboy-catching the bad guys

5. What do we cook when we BBQ?
~~With your grill

6. Where is your favorite place to BBQ?
~~Burger King (Haha and Yuck)

Happy Memorial Day Weekend everyone! Buckle up, Drive Safe, Use Safety seats for the kiddos and have a good time!

Behavior Problems Continue

Matthew's behavior problems are still happening at home. At school, he is still great. At home, the temper is flaring. He is throwing things, hitting and in general just not listening. I have decided to stop it now. I spoke to our pediatrician (whom you may remember we LOVE) and she gave me some great resources. We are going to try the Help Me Grow program first, it is an extension of our states Birth to Three program and has Child Psych/Parenting classes that go hand in hand. They figure out what is going on in your child's head and then teach you how best to parent your child. Pray they can take us! If not the local Children's Hospital has a Behavioral Couseling Program with Parent Training. I feel the key is not only learning how to understand him, but learning how to better parent him. It isn't all him. He's learned to push our buttons, but we've also learned how to respond to that pushing. We all need to be "retrained" to deal with each other. If they can't take us I have a whole list of Child Psych's she recommends! Wish us luck!

Do you believe in spirits?

On May 12th I wrote a post about losing my grandmother, since then I have been having strange occurances in our home. I have always believed in spirits, so I truly believe this is her. When I was young, I gave her an angel for Christmas, and for some reason it became a tradition. She developed quite a collection of angels, and other family members added a few pieces to it also. As I got older I too came to love angels and began collecting them, so when she passed away I asked my aunt if I could please have her collection as it was special to me. She gladly passed it on to me. I brought the collection back from Kansas with me and placed it with my collection, through out my home. I notice it everyday. Nothing has changed about it until this past week. Over the last week, every day when I enter a room one of Grandma's angels will fall over. Or one that Matthew can't reach will be turned around, and my husband didn't do it. Maybe this is her way of letting me know she is still watching over me. Lord knows I have been missing her lately, and since this has started happening, the pain has eased. Maybe it is her way of helping me. What do you think? Do you believe?

Sunday Six~Awareness

Brought to us every week by Kelly, this weeks theme is all about awareness. Matthew (age 5 yrs 4 months) didn't quite live up to his full potential (LOL...whatever that means for a child) cuz he's battling a cold. Lovely boogers and snots all over the place...yuck. So, here are his pretty tame answers this week.

1. When you see Mommy or Daddy on the computer, what are they doing?

~~Uh, working on the 'puter.

2. How does a telephone work?

~~I forgot-with its cable (interesting as all of ours are cordless!)

3. When you play a game at an arcade what happens to the coin you use to start the game?

~~It goes inside the video game and stays there forever.

4. How does milk stay cold?

~~From the fridgerator, duh

5. What makes the car move?

~~the whole car- engine, tires, everything!

6. How does a radio work?

~~It works with its engines.

There you have it. Let Kelly know if you played, and let us know too! Happy Sunday...hopefully it is sunny where you are...it is 60 and rainy here...blech.

Family

F A M I L Y
I ran into a stranger as he passed by, "Oh excuse me please" was my reply.
He said, "Please excuse me too; I wasn't watching for you."
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.

While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,
"While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."

By this time, I felt very small, And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.
"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."
I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay. I love you anyway."
I said, "Son, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than into our own family, an unwise investment indeed, don't you think? So what is behind the story? Do you know what the word FAMILY means? FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU

Mindless Ramblings.

Be prepared...this post will probably be all over the place. I took 2 Vicoden and 2 Xanax to try to stop my headache and I am feeling quite loopy, but I realized I haven't posted anything since Sunday. My neurologist is the best. He is working so hard to get my headaches under control. After 3 neuro's this one seems to actually care that the headaches affect my quality of life. So, 2 trips to the ER in the last 7 days is of course unacceptable and I see him Thursday.

Matthew's room cleaning plan is not going well. He is becoming destructive. He will take a cardboard type Playmobil toy and rip it up in shreds when he becomes mad. When I throw it away he DEMANDS a new one. I think not. I am going to call his Pediatrician tomorrow and look into a child psych because he is obviously not learning from us. He behaves so well at school, but at home he is an absolute devil. I am at my whits end. Have any of you felt this way before?

Work is insane. We are expecting our state survey from the Department of Public Health soon (by the end of May) and it HAS to be good or we are in soooo much trouble. They closed another 60 bed unit, and are doing lay offs. I am not on the lay off list, and I am not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing! Part of me would love to be laid off so that I could just get my pink slip, collect unemployment for a short time and hopefully find a better job. Who knows, they say the layoffs will be the "bad apples" so things should get better. Knock on wood.

OK, it has been raining here for 8 straight days....we have gotten over 6 inches. Do we need to start building an ark or what? I know we were praying for rain. But dude, all things in moderation please. OK, enough rambling for the night. My eyes keep crossing so that is my sign to get my butt to bed and let the Vicoden work its magic.

Sunday Six~Happy Mother's Day!

Brought to us every week by Kelly, this week is all about Mother's Day. So, if you played let her know, and let me know also!

1. What is a mommy?
~The parent of a kid

2. What do mommies do?
~Go to work when it's time to go to work.

3. What do you like best about your mommy?
~I like her when she gives me Playmobil guys and legos and takes me to school.
I love her a whole wadowski. (WTH is a wadowski?)

4. What do you not like (if anything) about your mommy?
~I don't like her spanking me.

5. What are things that mommies can't do?
~Can't play with legos-can you?

6. What did y ou do for your mommy for Mother's Day?
~I let her play legos with me.

So there you have it. Happy Mother's Day to all the cool blogging mom's out there, and a special Happy Mother's Day to the mom's I know IRL...especially mine. Love ya.

Life got in the way...

Life did get in the way. Does that sound like an excuse? I suppose it could be perceived as an excuse to many. The picture is the only picture I have of MY grandmother Dorothy with Matthew (he was 6 months old). We had gone home to Kansas for a visit, the first one since Matthew was born. We spent only one night at her home, a fact that will haunt me forever. We had so many people to visit, a family wedding, the excuses piled up. The truth is that my Grandmother wasn't a happy person. She tried to be, but life wasn't kind to her in many ways. I went out of my way to keep in touch with her though, and many family members didn't they will openly admit, so for that I will always be grateful. That was the last time I saw my Grandmother. Life got in the way and we didn't make another trip home for4 long years. I kept saying we were going to make it home, but it never happened. I will always regret that. I am thankful I have this picture of the two of them together. Grandma passed away near Thanksgiving two years ago. As far as we can piece together, she got ready for bed, put on her housecoat and sat in her favorite recliner to watch the nightly news. That is where my aunt found her at lunch time the next day. She obviously went peacfully. Probably just fell asleep and never woke up. My aunt eased some of my grief when she told me that my Grandmother was holding the last letter I wrote her in her hands, so I was on her mind. I am tearful now just thinking of that. I had been saying for weeks that I needed to call her, but life got in the way and it was always too late to call her that night. Then I never got the chance. I am missing her terribly tonight, no particular reason, nothing sparked it, just this terrible saddness in my heart. So, to all of you who read this: Take the time to call your grandparents and parents. Even if it isn't always on your list of favorite things to do. Don't let life get in the way....you may never get the chance again.

First Scrap Pages for Matthew's Book!

OK, blogger is being a bitch and won't load these pics in the order I want them to go in, but you get the idea. The Matthew's Memories page is obviously the beginning of the book, followed by the two blue pages. I decided to bite the bullet and get started tonight, and was able to crank these out in about 45 minutes. Felt like forever with chasing Matthew away from my supplies! LOL. I can't wait to get more done!

Kindergarten Round-Up

We made it through kindergarten round-up yesterday with flying colors! Matthew had such a great time. It was so cute to watch him. The teachers and administration would come up to meet him and kneal down to his level, and he would get all serious and stick out his hand to shake theirs and introduce himself. He did great! He went off with the other kids to the kindergarten class to do a project: they learned all about how carrots grow tall like them, then they planted a carrot in a styrofoam cup to bring home. During this time, the parents of course were doing the enrollment process and speaking to the school nurse and special resources team. I was a bit confused at the end because they didn't ask for money.......I grew up in Kansas and remember my parents having to buy workbooks. Pay book rentals and enrollment fees. So, I approached the principal shortly before the children were due to return from the classroom to ask if there was a FINAL enrollment date in late August/early September (school starts Setp. 19th here) so we can pay. She gave me a big hug and blessed me and said if I wanted to pay for books I could surely donate, but that in Connecticut, school is 100% free except for lunches. HOLY COW. No wonder our taxes are so high! LOL>my mom couldn't get over it either. So, all in all it was a fun morning! Matthew is absolutely ready for kindergarten and pumped up. So good to see that! I hope it remains that way as he gets older as I loved school and hope he does too!

Creative Memories Order Has Arrived!!

Yahoo....it came today! I won't bore you with pics (unless you want me too...LOL). The stuff is great. Already loving the cutting system, the ovals are the best! The corner rounder is kick butt. The bubble maker is AWESOME!! Got the star punch, the circle punch....hmmm, oh yeah a fancy square punch. The cobalt album for Matthew's book is beautiful. MMMMM....I shall be busy busy busy! I hope anyway. It is so hard to do with him around, he always wants to cut up the "pretty paper" uhhh sorry you can have some construction paper...step away from the 12x12 awesomely pretty paper Matthew.

~~~~~~~~~~

Tomorrow we also get to go to Kindergarten Round-up! Yahoo, officially get Matthew enrolled in kindergarten. I hope he enjoys the time at the "new" school tomorrow. He already has a little anxiety about leaving the school where he is attending pre-school. As long as they reassure him tomorrow that he can continue to do art projects all will be right in his five year old world! I, on the other hand, am having mixed feelings. I am saddened that he is "already" starting kindergarten (even though because his birthday is 1/8/01 he will be one of the oldest in his class), but another part of me is so ready for him to be attending school 5 days a week. Is that horrible? Our town has full day kindergarten five days a week! What an adjustment...he only goes 2 days a week now. I will have 2 days in the middle of every week that I am not working and he is in school. Yahoo....what to do what to do (scrapbooking here I come!). On the other hand, that will be quite an adjustment for the little guy....I am assuming they will still have a nap/quiet time every day as they are still young. I guess we will know more after tomorrow mornings "round-up"!

Sunday Six!

Brought to us by Kelly every week, this time the theme is all about getting OLD! So here are Matthew's answers:

1. How old is old?

~~uh, 5

2. Who do you think of when you hear the word OLD?

~~Uh, old lady

3. Are you old?

~~uh, no

4. What does it mean to get old?

~~Because you're an older lady all the time

5. How old should you be to get a job?

~~uh, I don't know

6. Who should take care of old people?

~~Hmmm, what? (Repeat question) Hmmm, grandpas, I always wanted to say that

Success: A clean room!

Well, I changed the plan a little. I took away the toys, the major ones: mega blogs, geotrax, little people, playmobile and rescue heroes. I left the room a mess. I left the papers all over the floor. The other toys (stuffed animals, legoes, etc...) scattered everywhere. I left the bed a crumpled mess. When I picked him up from school I informed him that some toys were gone now. Told him how to get them back: clean your room and keep it clean for 7 days! I got the usual: No fair, your mean, I hate you. Then I told him that I was willing to help him pick up his room, but only if he did the majority and really helped not just pushed things around like he usually does. Well, it only took an hour and it is cleaned from top to bottom. The toys are sorted into the appropriate baskets. The legoes are in the lego basket. The lincoln logs are in the lincoln log basket. The match box cars, blocks, puzzles, etc...all in the right baskets. This is big because when he cleans alone (or, umm, even with daddy) things just get shoved into any old basket. We dusted. We vacuumed. We changed the sheets on the bed. Now we are going to make a chart to show each day and whether or not he cleaned his room so he knows when it has been 7 days and he can start to get his toys back! Yahoo....I feel like a success as a mom once again. Finally. And the big part: No tears, no tantrums, just the little hissy fit in the car on the way home and it wasn't even bad (he wasn't too into it!). Thank you everyone for your well wishes. I did take before and after pics but he BEGGED me not to post them. I told him I wouldn't until he failed to clean his room for a day. How's that for blackmail. OK, so maybe a success as a mom is a stretch. But I'm doing it the best I can! LOL>gotta get through it the only way you know how, and with a smile!

Looking for a child?

Well, the battle continues and Matthew still won't clean his room. He has declared that he wants new parents, so I guess he is now shopping for a better (i.e. nicer) set, so if you know anyone looking for a very cute but seriously obstinant and stubborn five year old boy, let me know. Maybe we can make a trade. I might like to take a try at parenting a calm, sweet little girl...perhaps around a year old would be nice. Just saying.

So, let's see. This is where the battle stands: His TV/cable is disconnected. His DVD/VCR player is out of his room. I took all his DVD's and VCR tapes away. I took his VSMILE video game system away (took the power adaptor so it wouldn't work) and took the games away. And yes, before you can even say it: HE IS TOO SPOILED. We are working on it. I think when I found out I couldn't have anymore I took it to the extreme in making sure he had everything he could ever want, and everything I didn't have (which is ridiculous because I had WAY more than a lot of children ever dreamed of!)

The game plan: He knows (we told him over and over today) that while he is at school tomorrow that because he didn't clean it on his own we would clean it for him. He thought that was awesome until I informed him that his toys wouldn't be here when he got home. I am packing up his stuff and putting it in an extra storage space in the basement. Geotrax-gone. Little people-gone. Lincoln Logs-gone. Mega blocks-gone. Any of the toys that can't fit into the toy cabinet-gone. The toy cabinet has a lock-made sure to locate the key tonight and it will remain locked. I am sorry, but this child needs to learn that he has the nice things he has because it is a privilige, not a given. He must care for his things, or they will be gone.

The terms: If he keeps his room clean for 7 days, he may choose ONE item (mega blocks or geotrax, etc) to come back. And every 3 days after that one more item. If he doesn't clean his room before he goes to bed, he will be so upset when he wakes up because the item he chose last will be gone by morning (he is such a sound sleeper that I will be able to go in and bundle up the item to be confiscated!).

Permanent changes: The TV in his room is going to remain disconnected from cable. The cartoon network has become his fav channel and frankly the cartoons on this channel are WAY too violent. The Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy? Seriously, these two kids spend there time playing with the Grim Reaper. I don't think so. Way too much crap. His TV will be for DVD/VCR movies and VSMILE (educational video games). He is going to be much more limited as to his TV and it is going to be a hard adjustment I am sure. FOR US ALL, but it is for the best. We should never have let it get to this point to begin with, and I feel like a bad parent, but it's never to late, right? Right? God, I hope so! My mom is probably reading this saying THIS is what she was talking about last year when we visited....Mom you were SO right, and I knew it then, but I guess I took the easy way out and let him continue on the way he was. Now we are all suffering, mostly him as you are right: CHILDREN WANT TO BE PARENTED. They want to be punished when they are wrong, it lets them know they are loved. Do they know they want this? Of course not! Thanks mom, sorry it took so long to listen. Love you.

So, pray for us as we go through the next few weeks. They are going to be rough, but it is for the entire family's own good. And we will be a better family for it, I just know it. We just have to take it one day at a time. What is such a mind boggling thing is that he is an absolute angel at school: picks up toys, behaves, obeys, plays nicely. And is the opposite at home. But, I have been reminded that it is better it is this way than reversed: If he behaved at home and was a devil at SCHOOL it would be much worse. Ok, off to bed...going to be a long day of confiscating toys tomorrow. Wish me luck.

I Hate You.

Three little words. Hurt so much sometimes. Matthew has been home from school for about 6 hours now, and I can't count how many times he has told me he hates me since then. I am such a mean mom. I will not let him use his TV until he cleans his room. I will not let him use his DVD/VCR player in his room or the living room until he cleans his room. I will not let him play V-Smile video games until he cleans his room. I will not let him play Leap Pad until he cleans his room. I will not let him use his race track until he cleans his room. Such a mean mom! But I mean come on...the kid made a disaster area out of his room. He is 5 years old and knows how to clean his room and won't do it. Now he is in there and I am sure he has put him self to bed rather than clean, so the battle will resume in the morning. Oh the glory of THAT on my day off. Joy Joy. He is an absolute ANGEL at school they tell us and for the last 2 weeks has been a living nightmare at home. The power struggles we are having are the worst I have ever seen. Time outs are useless, he gets up and repeats the problem and ends right back up in time out. The pouting, whining, screaming have got to end. Must put some thought into this, any suggestions are more than welcome.